Mom and brother financially straining my marriage

Errin wrote:

My husband and I have been married for 3 years and recently my Mother and Brother moved in with us from Florida because of my Step Father's drinking problems.

Here's my problem, my brother is almost 26 years old and has been babied his whole life. He's never had a job, doesn't do anything but watch tv all day. Lazy!! Mom works but only gives us
appx. $300 a month and that's it! Not even food.

Neither one of them help me with housework unless I ask. I have 3 teenage kids from a previous marriage and I just got over thyroid cancer.

How do I politely ask them to find their own place or start looking? My husband and I pay for everything! I'm desperate for help!!!

Dear Errin

As you obviously didn't think all this through before they moved in ("has been babied his whole life"), you'll have to bite the bullet now.

It's not just about the money; you've barely mentioned your husband, except as provider, but I'm guessing he's under as much strain as you - or more.

First talk to him; you need to stand together on this, or risk your marriage.

Second, talk to them. Forget politeness, this is the time for plain speaking. Your brother pays his way or moves out. Stop babying him, will ya?

I'm guessing you can be more merciful to your mother ... but is she paying so little because that's all she can afford, or is she taking advantage of your weakness too?