How can we overcome confusion?Wanda wrote: Last semester
I met this cute guy in my theatre class. He started to talk to me all of a sudden,
I had never paid attention to him. So, we got really close in terms of friendship,
he shared with me a lot of personal stuff, like his health problems, etc. Besides
that, whenever I misunderstand his jokes, he says stuff like "You know that
I am kidding, I will not hurt you,I do not mean anything bad, etc." He also
did tons of stupid stuff like singing a love song for me in front of common friends,
stealing jokingly my possessions, etc. Once I was tired and acted kind of stupid
to him and he was angry for a week and told me that he will wait for me to grow
up. Still, during that week I got very sick and he acted like crazy. I
almost fainted with dizziness in a sport activity and though he pretended still
to be angry, he simply rushed to me and shouted "Are you OK? Oh my god, what
happened?" With the others he pretends to be very self-confident and
not caring about anyone, but with me he is a completely different person, very
shy, gentle and sincere, and he always tries to comfort me. Once when I was sad,
he said "I do not know what to tell you." I said "You do not need
to tell me anything." And he said " But I want to comfort you, to help
you. Currently the only thing we are saying to each other is "hi".
I desperately want to talk to him but I am so afraid and it seems to me he feels
the same way. Both of us have a lot of friends with whom we act perfectly normal,
but when it comes to talk with each other, it simply does not work. I mean, not
that we do not want but somehow we get confused and do not know what to say, especially
he. So, I wonder if he has ever liked me and if so, doe she still like me
and how can we overcome that situation? Thank you so much for your help.
Dear Wanda It's not confusion, it's mind games. One of
you - and I suspect it's you - panics when you get close, and pushes away. Sooner
or later, the person being pushed will give up, trust me. Why do I think it's
you that is the problem? Because you say "I wonder if he has ever liked me"
- because that's a really, really stupid question; if you cannot see your hand
in front of your face, you'll face a lonely life. Take a risk will you? TALK
to him. |