Forbidden Love, What to do!

Bob wrote:

I'm 19 now, and i've been in all out love with this girl since we were 16. At first we both fell for each other, everything was great ... we both agree that it was the best summer of our lives. It got wierd one night, my fault for not being more confident (mom came in basement after we were making out, and after she left I never kissed her again). It went dry for a week or 2, then she went on a 3 week vacation and the feelings dropped. Me and her however still became best friends, we're a perfect match ... at least I think Anyways, at the start of the school year, about 1 semester in ... she started talking with my cousin, and they've been going out for about 2 1/2 years now off and on. Nearly everytime shes drunk shes all over me but I could never do anything out of respect for my cousin, although I know hes been with other girls in their time. That was in the summer after grade 12, then I went off to a far university.... we talked all the time online and shes been down to my place a few times with some other friends. I asked her what it was that ended things. She said the sparks just stopped, but she still always thinks about how things could have been. My cousin she's with is my first cousin, and him and his brother are definately my closest cousins, in terms of relationship and all that. I personally think we were meant to be and something will eventually happen ... but its gotten to the point where shes family affiliated, comes out at family gatherings and knows pretty much everyone in my family. I just really need some input on how to pursue this, any comment is welcomed.

Thanks in advance

Dear Bob

Move on.

If she really cared, she'd ditch your cousin. She likes to flirt, likes the flattery of a long term fan.

But the chances of anything 'happening' is pretty remote. think about it - even if she fell out with your cousin, would she really want to pick up another family member?

And if anything did happen ... it's not just your cousin who'd be against you.

Stop dreaming, and find someone who really could care about you. Nothing is 'meant to be' - that's an excuse to wait around while life passes you by. And you know it.