If you could save their marriage

Faith wrote:

I like the advice you've given the previous writers, so I like to ask you for the advice. Well, this isn't about me, but about my brother. I'm very worried about him.

The problem is that he and his wife don't have mutually satisfying compromise and it cause them to break up, but the kids are innocent though. He'd suspect that his wife has been cheating on him though he has no prove of it just the hickey on her necks and that she did not slept in the same room with him anymore since two years ago.

Things are changed in her, she would go out a lot and talked on cell phone with her friends a lot and working overtimes everyday for two years including Saturday and (Sunday-sometimes). The way she dressed, and her music style were changed also. Everytime they talks, it ends up being an argument. She goes shopping every day and left him with the children.

They only have two kids, one is in school, other is not. He had worked third shift for many years, and that required sleep, but he have take kid to school, and came home taken care of the other while she's at work. His moving out many times and going back.

This time he said he will not get back, still he take his kid to school and pick up on daily basis. There's so many times that he think she's out to cheat. From my knowledge, she's always lies about many things in the past and even her own parents thinks she's cheat too. There's a rumor going around about it also.

According to my brother, he'd said many times she would lock him out. He even check the underwear too, but she told him that it was her period. She always said that her husband is a STUPID man even in front of me or her kids. If you could save their marriage, please help! Thanks!

Dear Faith

What's to save?

They have no mutual respect, no mutual affection, no trust.

They have no marriage.

If you'd offered any suggestion that they cared a dime about eachother, then there might be hope. But you cannot create life in a corpse - and this marriage is cold, dead and buried.

Be grateful that the kids are being supported; help your brother to come to terms with reality. But why can't you see what you've just described to me?