My friend plays me

doodlebugz578 wrote:

My "best" friend is a guy. A while ago I asked him to go to the dance with me, but I didn't tell him that I just wanted to go as friends. I just assumed that he thought that I meant that we were then going out.

I didn't want to go out with him because it would ruin our friendship but I didn't want to tell him that because I though it would hurt his feelings so I just went along with it. well last wednesday, we broke up.

The way he did it was wrong- he got one of my girl friends to write me a note saying that he wanted to break up with me. At first I was angry and hurt because all that time, I wanted to break up with him and there he was dumping me?? So I didn't talk to him until the next day when a couple of our friends made us get together and work things out. He said that it had started when I assumed that we were going out (we were thinking the same thing but we just didnt talk about it with each other) well we worked things out and we were best friends again.

Friday, we were supposed to go to the eighth grade dance together but when I got there he was dancing with a group of girls (one of which I can't stand-past history) and I felt heartbroken because he was dancing with them and not even paying attention to me. I told another one of my girl friends and she said that she heard him ask (THE CHICK THAT I HATE) to the dance!

I couldn't handle all that at once so I called my mom to come pick me up. When she got there she talked me into staying and just having fun with my girl friends. I went back in and he kept staring at me but I just ignored him. my friends tried to talk to him and came back to me. he admitted that he did ask the other chik to the dance and he didn't care anymore- we had broken up.

I hated him for that. To make a long story short, we kinda made up but he's still doing the same things to me. He just doesnt get it. I know I should talk to him but what should I say? should I just dump him? should I just play along until the school year is finished? HELP!!!

Dear doodlebugz578

Start by deciding what you actually want.

Then go get it.

So far, you seem to be sending confused and contradictory signals, and expecting the poor guy to read your mind. If you don't know what you want, how can he?

He's obviously very interested, but so far, whatever he does is wrong in your eyes, so he's not likely to keep trying much longer.