Younger Man - Or Mind Games?

Browneyedgirl wrote:

So, when a guy younger than you says "I just want to be friends" is that what he truely means? I don't normally date younger guys but I figured I'd give it a shot this time, why not.

Upon breaking up with my then boyfriend, I decided to try out something new. We said from the get-go we were just going to be "friends" and well, you know how that goes.

He told me all the sweet things I thought I wanted to hear, gave the best kisses, blah, blah, blah...Then a month later, after introducing me to his family, he text messages me and lets me know he Just Wants To Keep it Friends!

Hmm ... thought thats all we were anyway, right? Any advice?

Dear Browneyedgirl

Before worrying too much about what he wants, and what he's thinking, you might find it useful to consider what you want.

If you are both declaring 'just friends' and both meaning it, then you don't have a problem.

If he is saying one thing and meaning another, he has a problem which could hurt you.

But if you are saying one thing and meaning another, then you have the problem ... and you will most certainly be hurt.

In any relationship, starting as 'just friends' can be for real, or a defense against hurt; no problem. But if the relationship is changing (or you want it to) then you need to renogiate the deal!

Be sure what you want, then talk to him.

PS - and the younger man issue is quite separate - mind games are not generation-specific!!