Will He Know?

Keera wrote:

Recently me and my boyfriend have been talking about have sex...Well the thing is he thinks that I have done it once before...but I haven't and what I want to know is that instead of telling him I am a virgin. Will he be able to tell when we do it? or can could I say something like it's been a while...since after all your stuff does tend to tighten after it's been a while since you last had intercourse.

Dear Keera

How 'tight' you are has very little to do with whether or not you have had sex before. Some women blled the first time, but by no means all.

If he can tell, it is much more likely that he will know by your behaviour; sex is not quite what people tell you, not quite what shows on the screen. I think most people learn something the first time, if only something about their feelings.

Much, much better to be honest than to have him tell you afterward, which is likely (though not certain - some men just don't notice these things).