Our intimacy has been near zero
I have been married for 18 years now. We had two babies that died before
two months old.
I found out on my 10th wedding anniversary that my husband had hidden
from me for one year the fact that he had an affair and fathered a child.
At the time he wasent "sure" it was his, but the picture looked
just like him and as soon as I saw it I knew it was his for sure.
Since that time our intimacy has been near zero!
Although I had two car accidents in the past two years, he hasn't even
really tried except once. I could go on, but to sum it up, everything
I say he takes wrong and gets angry. we seem to disagree on everything
now and I just don't know what to do.
What's your take on it? Would you try to save it? He won't talk to me
at all now because of a disagreement - he says he has nothing to say to
I am feeling so hurt right now and confused.
It sounds like your marriage has been over for 8 years. You don't tell
me your reaction to his infidelity, so I cannot tell whether you have
forgiven him, or spent 8 years punishing him.
If you want to save the marriage (Do you?), then I strongly suggest professional
counselling, as the damage is deep and has festered for years.
There's no short answer to this one.