Dealing With Letting Go
I have been with my daughter's father for six years and he is a drug
addict. I love him and have tried everything to help him, but know it
is his choice.
I have told him to leave I don't know how many times only to let him
come back home. It tears me apart to see him the way he is. How do I let
go and stick to my word when I tell him to leave.
Our daughter is getting old enough to know something is really wrong
with her dad. I don't want her to see him this way. Please help!
It really depends on what you really want - If you wish to help him,
then you know that giving in is simply prolonging his agony, whereas if
you are strong, you may bring forward the day when he has to make his
life or death decision.
And you know that the longer you let him avoid that decision, the harder
it will be for him, and the more likely he will choose death.
Of course, he will never see it in those terms. But you know what he
is doing to himself, you know that he is going to get (mentally) weaker.
You know that he needs to see strength around him, and needs all the remaining
strength he has.
So, if you love him, let him go. And pray that he chooses life.
For it is a fact that love cannot cure addiction ... courage can start
the process (your courage) and courage can complete the process (his courage).
I know of no short cuts. And no, it will not be easy.
And as you point out, his daughter needs to be protected from his current
choices. as, I suspect, you do too.