I Want To Lose My Virginity

Erika wrote:

I just wanted to ask you a quick question , ok , me and my boyfriend are thinking about having sex , and I have protection and birth control , you know but I was just wondering ... is it going to hurt ?

I mean I know in some occasions you bleed , but will it feel like a knife going up me or like when I first put in a tampon?

I am 16 , and I am definitely ready, we have been dating for a year (almost). So please answer my questions I would really appreciate it , and please keep this confidential

Me and my friend have been discussing this : when does the average person in America lose their virginity? She says it is 19 , I say it's 17 0r 18 ? and don't tell me there is not an average because there is . So I am just curious.

Dear Erika

For some it hurts, for some it doesn't - and all points in between.

If you really are 'ready' - that is, not anxious about it, and physically ready - lots of natural lubrication - chances are it won't be too bad.

But some women do find it very painful. All you can do to reduce this risk, is take it slowly and gently, and only do it when you are really 'ready' - mentally and physically.

Whether you should be doing it is really none of my business - but I remind you that this is a once in a lifetime event. Do think first!

As for average ages, who knows? I'm sure that there's been various studies done but they are usually studies of college students in one city, and usually a small-ish group.

So far as I know, the datres are not recordd by the government, so there's no official figure. Also, I'm sure it varies a lot across the country, and between different religions .. so an avrage wouldn't tell you much.