Can there be a second chance?

Melanie wrote:

My ex-boyfriend and I broke up a while back. Ever since we broke up, I have still had feelings for him. I'm trying to get over him so I can get on with my life. I think I'm mostly afraid that if I move on and find someone else, that I might miss a second chance with him.

He and I have had conversations discussing what each of us thought about getting back together. One time, he told me that he thought we should wait a few years. He then said soon after that that he thought we should stay friends for good.

Soon after that, we were discussing the subject, and I had mentioned that I wasn't the only one who thought we should be together, so he asked me who else thought that. I told him that many people have told me that we should get back together.

He then said that he didn't know what was there between us, if there was anything, so he couldn't predict what was to come in the future for us. I know he's right, that he doesn't know what will happen, but, right now..I just want to know what I should do.

And, I know you don't know what he's feeling and you don't know what he's thinking..but if you could maybe give me an idea of what you THINK he's thinking..that would be a big help. Thanks for taking the time to read this. It's much appreciated.

Dear Melanie

I know exactly what he's thinking. [I was young once].

He's thinking "Melanie may or may not be lovely / sexy / The Best. But I do not want to get married. Period." Word for word.

The more you whine, mope, nag, sulk ... the more he'll move away. What's your problem? There's no law says you can't get together in the future, is there?

Live now. You may meet someone better, you may not. He may come back, he may not.

You don't own him - and he ain't about to pretend you do!